Going into marriage, I knew that not only is communication important and required, but so was working together as a team. It's been two years now and we've done pretty good.
2005 brought our wedding and buying a house. I did the grunt work on the wedding and Dan did the grunt work on the house. It worked out GREAT!! Last year during the pregnancy, I did the grunt work on the baby and baby gear and prepping and Dan took care of everything else, including me... he took care of the house, food and me. After Evan was born, Dan and I shared responsibilities around the house and concerning Evan. I mean, I can meet friends for dinner after work and not have any concerns of Evan's care b/c he's with Dan.
BUT... the one time I planned an event... the one time I didn't communicate to Dan what was going to happen and what the exact agenda was for Evan's First Birthday Party was the time I most needed to... b/c he had to do it on his own!!!
That's right. I spent weeks preparing the menu, agenda, games, favor bags, supplies, desserts, cake, camera moments... I planned it all. Then 15min after it started, I accidentally ate something that had peanuts. YIKES!!! Being someone who is allergic to all types of nuts, this wasn't a good thing. I took a benedryl hoping I'd feel better. We did the cake and was preparing to start the games. But then it happened... my allergic reaction came flowing forward and I was hauled up in bed for the rest of the party.
It suddenly became Dan's responsibility to entertain the guests, take care of Evan, and "Throw the party"!!! And since I never communicated the agenda, or the planned games, or the prizes, or even the location of the favor bags for the kids.... it all just didn't matter. Luckily, my cousin Sigrid was there and she helped Dan... for example, she decided it was time for tea and coffee and then time to leave.... little did they know, folks were having so much fun, then stayed for a second cup.
So I beg the question.... was it a bad party? Evan had fun. I think the guests had fun.... the first guests began to leave around 4. And for a party that was scheduled to end at 2:30... I think 4 is pretty good.
So that was Evan's party... he had his friend Christopher and his cousins Samiah and Emma and also Emily and Andres... we had friends and family for CT, MA and NJ and Toronto join us for the special celebration. Yet the day reminded Dan of our wedding... where he only got to speak to folks for no more than 3 min and had to keep running around between Evan and the kitchen. And the day reminded me more of 1 year ago the days following Evan's Birth Day... I was loopy, sick, and totally out of it!!!
The next morning, Evan got to enjoy his gifts and his balloons. I got to enjoy breakfast and sunlight. And Dan got to enjoy doing nothing.
Unfortunately, we didn't get any photos during the party... we got some of Evan opening his gifts, but none that the party existed. I do have hopes that my friend has a couple of photos... but if not, this party will definitely be ingrained in my memory as the most memorable birthday party.... YET!!!
Lesson learned for the future.... I won't take "sole" responsibility on such events and I'll fully communicate my wishes and desires... and hopefully avoid this in the future... The key to communication is TEAMWORK!!!
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